Child-Less and Child-Free

Dawn Olsen over at Up Yours opened a can of worms with her well-reasoned comments about pro-choice. I have always considered myself to be pro-choice, even though I decided at a very young age that I did not want children. Then fate intervened to ensure that I’d hold to my word. I had a complete hysterectomy at the tender age of 30. Woot. No more Red Death.

Anyway, some of the comments to Dawn’s post (most notably those by Doug) indicated that the man, once confronted with the fact of the pregnancy, should also be allowed to choose whether he wants to hang around and help raise the kid or buck and run.

“Just Another Guy” says that women need to be more careful who they choose to father their children. As if they could predict beforehand that the guy is gonna buck and run? When did women become mindreaders, guys?

My solution to that issue is simple. Men who are not interested in raising children should run, not walk, to their nearest urologist and sign up for a vasectomy. Never again will they have to worry about a pregnancy scare. It doesn’t get any easier than that.

As to the question of when abortion becomes murder, well that depends on who you ask. If you ask me, until the fetus becomes viable on its own, able to sustain itself without life support, it is just a parasite on the mother (host). Plain and simple. Now I’ll probably catch ten different kinds of flak for posting this, but it’s what I believe. Unless the child can live on its own outside it’s mother’s womb, in my opinion (and I am not a doctor, a cleric or a lawyer), it is not a viable life form.

You may be wondering why I never wanted children. Don’t know the answer to that. I had what I considered a fairly happy childhood. I knew a mother’s love, unconditional love. Although I was raised without a father figure, I don’t feel I’ve sought a father replacement in any of the mates I’ve chosen. And I think I did pretty well choosing Roberto. But he never wanted kids either, and I think that worked out well for us.

I have always viewed child rearing as an awesome responsibility. Perhaps I felt I was not up to the task — would never be up to such a daunting task. Maybe I didn’t want to bring a baby into an already overcrowded world. Or perhaps I felt I couldn’t offer him the things that a child may need to grow up healthy and well-adjusted. Who knows. Point is, I’ll never have to make that decision. But I jealously guard the right of other women to have the freedom to do so.

And to Dawn I say, VERY WELL SAID.

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